Distance

I am so far away from everyone. Everyone I care about.

I’m not talking metaphorically. I mean, I am seriously geographically distanced from family and friends.

I try not to think about it too often, but there are some moments when it really hits me hard.

Tonight, for instance, I was walking around Milwaukee. I walked into a restaurant and sat by myself. Nearby me, I could hear friends joking and laughing. And from where I sat I saw families smiling. I even saw a couple walk in before I entered and they were holding hands and giggling.

It made me feel alone.

It’s funny how having technology supposedly removes the barrier of loneliness by allowing people easy access to contact each other. But in reality, it isn’t the same as having face-to-face interactions with another human being that you care about.

I don’t know how much longer I can handle being on my own in Milwaukee.

It’s always the same: I go to work, go to a bar or workout, then I end up alone in my hotel room or sometimes my car if I forget to book a room.

I am trying to be positive, but it’s so hard sometimes.

I’m only in Milwaukee for this job. That’s it. Even though it pays well, it doesn’t seem worth it.

I want to be closer to home. I want to hangout with my friends and my cat, haha. And I just want to make games.

I need to focus on all the positive things. It isn’t worth seeing things in such a negative light.

So, I will do my best to not think of the distance that separates me from everyone I care about. Instead, I will focus on when I will see them next and how important of a role, each and every person has played in bringing me to this point in my life.

-The Not-So-Distant CodeDruid

Time is of the Essence

Have you ever felt impatient?

If you haven’t, then I don’t know if you are human.

But seriously, in life, sometimes it takes time to get to where you want to be. That applies in so many situations. Work, friendships, relationships… you name it!

I’m at a point in my life where I have a fantastic career. I have a lot of goals. And a lot of my debt and things that hold me down are starting to disappear. Things are settling down for me, finally.

The one thing that seems to elude me is…you guessed it – Time.

I can’t seem to keep track of my days anymore. Everything blurs together. It’s kinda scary.

I’ve got stuff planned out which is cool. And the way time is slipping by, I’m sure those things will be here sooner than expected.

What I’ve come to realize is that life is most fulfilling when you take the time spend it with the people you care about. That should be obvious.

It amazes me how quickly I can get sidetracked though. But I don’t let that discourage me. I always try to think positive.

Having a passion for life, especially a hobby or something/someone in your life makes your time spent living worth every second.

I might be rambling at this point, but I hope everything I said made sense.

Remember to take things slow and take time to cherish every moment you have. Life is short.

–The Time-Eluding CodeDruid

The Feels

Dude. Okay. So life is flipping good right now.

Never Time’s one year anniversary is in a few days.

My job is challenging, rewarding, and I’ve learned a lot.

I was able to help one of my good friends get a sweet job.

I started up my workout routine again.

And there are some other things that are going quite awesome.

That’s not to say I don’t have some lonely days when I’m in Milwaukee. But things are looking up. I’ve met some great people and I’ve had some fantastic mentors throughout my career thus far.

Also, my loans are gradually being paid off, so I don’t have to feel as chained down.

One of the most important things I have learned is that “good things come to those who wait…” at least it applies towards a lot of things.

The best thing to do is to always try to look at the positive side of things. It makes life more exciting.

I have two game projects I’m working on and taking my time on those as I code while I’m at 42 Lounge. It’s a slow process. But I enjoy it.

I don’t have much to show at the moment. But perhaps in another post I can share some video or screenshots.

I hope my positive experiences lately can bring someone a bit of comfort. I know this is just a blog post, but I always strive to be transparent and relatable as I can.

Game development is tough. And one’s personal life plays a big part in it.

Love those life lemons!

-CodeDruid